Thursday, February 21, 2013

Performance Improvement Plan

The PIP was on his desk when he came in. George grabbed it up and went into Henry's open office.
What the hell is this?
Henry looked up behind his large desk.
What, George?
This! This fucking PIP!
Henry sat back. He looked great for the morning. Shiny shined. Teeth cleaned. Hair watered.
You mean the performance improvement plan he asked calmly.
Yeah. I come in and find this...this...thing on my desk. I got kids and a mortgage,  Henry. I don't need this extra stress.
Henry clasped his hands and smiled gently.
I have kids and a mortgage too, George.
Oh please. You live in a mansion and your kids all go to private schools. It's not the same
Henry laughed lightly.
Its not a mansion. Look, we had a good meeting yesterday George and so I just put it in writing.
Henry held the PIP up and read.
And if these conditions are not met then termination is an option. He looked up. That's putting it in writing?
This is not a witch hunt George. I want you to succeed more than anyone else.
I do. And so does Diane.
She hates me George muttered.
She is your processor. She doesn't hate you George.
Yes she does. She hates my accent. My files. What I eat. She hates me.
Henry clasped his hands like a counselor.
Look. Lets implement the plan we talked about and then the PIP will go away.
The only reason to have a PIP is so I won't sue you when you fire me he said dully.
Henry laughed again.
George. George. That's just not true.
Yeah it is.
Its for your improvement George. Not your termination.
Uh huh.
George left Henry's office and sat at his desk. He stared at the PIP. He signed it and left it on his desk. One week later Henry canned him.
Rocket Man..the novel of fathers and sons

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